What To Do...

I’ve been busy working full time for three months as of yesterday. Aside from bombarding my brain with the details and procedures of learning a new place and remembering how to be an optician after a year off it’s been a relatively stress free time. Then the other day I was asked if I knew anything of our September situation yet.

September???

But that’s…..,

wait a minute….,

ONLY THREE WEEKS AWAY!

There are way too many ‘if’s’ in our life to know how to go about planning for September. ‘If’ Trevor gets a job than the original plan was for me to work one to two days a week. “If” Trevor does not get a job than he has to be able to substitute teach. So we’re thinking he would be available three days a week and I would work three days a week. Both of these scenarios require minimal child care for Sierra. One day a week is all I’m looking at – that’s not much, easy right?

I wish! I have absolutely no idea who will look after Sierra. I don’t know who to ask or where to look. I also am not willing to leave my precious daughter with just anyone. Day homes often won’t agree to one day a week. There are too many people needing full-time day care for them to do that. Then there's the issue of cost. I'm willing to pay someone to watch Sierra but then how much is it and is it worth going to work to pay for some else to be with my child?

‘If ‘ Trevor is able to get a full-time job (the ideal and desperately prayed for scenario) than I would even seriously consider not working except for a few Saturdays or the odd Thursday evening. That I can deal with. It’s the subbing situation that has me in knots. I need to work to ensure some consistent income. Trevor needs to sub to stay active and known in the school system to improve his chances when permanent positions come up. Sierra needs someone to care for her on the days we both work.

Being a mom brings such heartache sometimes.